What is Sexaholics Anonymous?
Sexaholics Anonymous (SA) is an unincorporated association of individuals and groups offering a Twelve Step recovery program to people addicted to lust, sex, dependency relationships, and various forms of self-destructive sexual thinking and behaviour.
SA is a relatively young Twelve Step fellowship — the first regular meeting started in 1981 in the USA, and the fellowship has since grown to hundreds of groups worldwide.
How does Sexaholics Anonymous differ from other sex-related fellowships?
Sexaholics Anonymous is different from other sex-related fellowships because it has a definition of sobriety. In SA, a person is sober today if they have not had sex with themself or a partner other than a spouse. In other S-fellowships, members determine their own definition of sobriety. SA has no opinion on the benefits or physiological effects of sexual abstinence; members stop the behaviour and then seek progressive victory over lust.
What kind of problems does Sexaholics Anonymous address?
SA members come from all walks of life, with a wide variety of compulsive sexual behaviours — ranging from compulsive masturbation to prostitution, and from pornography to dependent relationships. In some cases the behaviour is extreme. The common thread is an obsession with sex to the extent that normal life has become unmanageable — the sexaholic has lost the power of choice and is not free to stop their self-destructive behaviour.
SA doesn't claim to solve these problems, only that members presenting these symptoms have been able to stop for open-ended periods of time by working the SA program of recovery. SA has no opinion as to whether people with these kinds of problems are sexaholics or not.
How do people recover in Sexaholics Anonymous?
Recovery starts with stopping the particular sexual behaviour(s). After “getting sober,” members follow a series of personal activities known as the Twelve Steps, adapted from the original Twelve Steps of Alcoholics Anonymous. These steps involve admitting there is a problem, seeking help, self-appraisal, confidential self-disclosure, making amends where harm has been done, and working with other sexaholics who want to recover. Central to the program is the idea of a “spiritual awakening,” emphasizing its practical value.
There are no counsellors or therapists in SA — members meet at regular meetings where people share their own experience, strength, and hope. SA provides no vocational, legal, financial, psychiatric, medical, or professional services.
What happens at an SA meeting?
Meetings generally last 1–2 hours and are held in public places such as a church or community building. Members gather, there's usually a reading from literature or a guest speaker's story, and then members talk about how they relate to what was read or said. People may also use the time to work through a particular difficulty. Tea and coffee are generally served before or after the meeting.
Is Sexaholics Anonymous a religious organisation?
No. SA has no religious affiliations. Although the recovery program is spiritual, it is essentially practical.
Can all gender identities attend meetings?
Yes. SA meetings are open to all gender identities and sexual orientations. Occasionally, members have formed smaller cohorts based on gender identity, depending on the comfort of all involved.
Who funds Sexaholics Anonymous?
SA is entirely self-supporting from members' contributions. It's policy to turn down financial offers from external bodies or individuals.
Can people representing SA advise on external committees or boards?
No. One SA Tradition states that “SA has no opinion on outside issues; hence the SA name ought never be drawn into public controversy.” Nothing stops an individual member from expressing their own opinions on outside issues, but no one can speak for SA.
How does SA work with professionals?
SA has a tradition of co-operation rather than affiliation with the professional community. SA welcomes co-operation from government, clergy, helping professions, and voluntary organisations — and is happy to provide information, speakers, literature, and contact details about recovery through the fellowship. SA's non-sexaholic friends have been instrumental in helping SA grow around the world.
How is anonymity preserved?
Personal anonymity is the safeguard of every SA member. First names are generally used at meetings.